First Comes Baby, Then Comes Marriage, Wait Hang On
by ballonballon
Summary: The tail-end of year two of the Santos Administration finds Josh and Donna facing a whole new kind of dilemma.
1. Chapter 1

Donna's ears perked up as she heard the front door click open and then creak closed slowly. The feint glow of the microwave clock in their dim townhouse kitchen read 1:32 a.m. With a quick look to the open archway that opened the rest of the house up to the kitchen, Donna glanced down at the five inch piece of plastic she had recapped and placed on the counter in front of her. She'd lost track of time of how long she'd been sitting there. An hour? Maybe two? A million different thoughts were all floating through her head and mingling together to create a thick haze of fear and elation. She heard Josh's footsteps approaching the kitchen and took a deep breath. She felt her heart pound with every approaching footstep and before he turned the corner, Donna swiped up the pregnancy test and quickly put it into the pocket of her plaid pajama shorts.

"Donna," came Josh's tired greeting as he emerged from the shadows behind the archway.

"What are you still doing up?" a mixture of concern and exasperation were in his voice. They had long since passed the point where Donna would insist on waiting up for him when he was held up at the office. It wasn't practical for either of them. Donna was losing sleep and Josh was too since they'd always end up talking for at least another hour about their days. So seeing Donna up at this hour immediately set off alarm bells for Josh.

Donna didn't answer straight away, frantically debating with herself trying to decide if she should tell Josh tonight. She took in his haggard appearance; there was stubble lining the lower half of his face, bags under his eyes. She sighed, he needed sleep. They needed to have this conversation when they both weren't exhausted. That and she was slightly apprehensive about how Josh would react.

This positive pregnancy test was far from planned. They had discussed kids and both wanted them, but mutually agreed that the White House needed to come first right now. Both of them cared about their jobs so deeply and they wanted to do them well. Though they were hardly putting their relationship on hold; an engagement ring glittered bright on Donna's left hand. Five months ago, Josh had dropped to one knee amongst a fluffy of cherry blossom trees outside of their townhouse. The ring had been burning a hole in his pocket for weeks and after every known male in the White House had given him advice on how the proposal needed to be some big grand gesture, Josh decided he couldn't wait any longer. He gave a non-rehearsed, stutter filled speech and Donna had laughed at him with tears in her eyes. Wedding plans thus far though had been put on the back burner, there just hadn't been time.

"Couldn't sleep," she answered cheaply, only holding his gaze for a brief moment before she slid off the stool and walked over to him, giving him a quick peck on the cheek. She grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the stairs. Josh hesitated and Donna looked back.

"Everything okay?" he asked, his eyes narrowing slightly.

Donna nodded with a smile. Looking to distract him she said, "How was your meeting?"

Josh groaned immediately and pulled up his free hand to rub across his eyes. Donna smile turned sympathetic. Things were finally beginning to wrap up in Kazakhstan after months and months of intense negotiations, but lately that meant Josh was stuck in meetings until the early hours of the morning.

"Let's go to bed," Donna encouraged. She pulled a little harder on Josh's hand and he looked up at her, suspicion still swimming in his eyes. Donna tried her best to maintain a look of innocence, but she wasn't totally sure it was working. Josh hesitated another moment before relenting and following her up the stairs.

"How did the First Lady's speech go?" Josh asked after they reached the landing on the top of the stairs. Donna turned and gave him a look. This was always how it started and then they'd be up talking until they regretted it.

"Right. I'll ask tomorrow," Josh laughed lightly. It'd been a while since they'd gone through this particular exercise. Once they had both settled into bed 10 minutes later, Josh was out almost immediately. Donna however, remained awake and staring hard at the ceiling, looking for answers on how to break the news to Josh. After a long while, she heard soft snores start to come from him and she turned over onto her side, propping her head up with a hand to look at him. A warm smile came to her face as she watched him sleep.

The man was hardly a graceful sleeper. Josh had an arm draped over his forehead and Donna let out a laugh as she took in the face he was making in his sleep. His face twitched and a dimple appeared on Josh's cheek. She blinked as she was suddenly struck with the image of a baby with Josh's dimples. A warm glow started to flicker faintly in her chest.

More images started coming to mind. Josh holding a tiny baby, rocking it to sleep. Josh attempting to change a diaper, Josh dressing their kid head to toe in Mets gear. Her hand absent-mindedly found its way to her still flat stomach and a finger started tracing a circle.

Josh suddenly rolled over and pulled the pillow over his face, still fast asleep and the moment broke. Donna remembered how tired Josh had been these past few months dealing with the Kazakhstan business. Talks had been promising, but they weren't exactly signing a deal tomorrow. What if he was upset at the timing? Would he be unhappy at the sudden, unexpected twist in his and Donna's life together? Josh was hardly getting enough sleep as it is, now add a baby to the mix? Donna's face fell and she folded her arm down to rest her head against the pillow. Were they even ready to be parents? Her eyes focused on the spinning blades of the ceiling fan above them and eventually, not quickly enough, she drifted off to sleep.

Donna awoke the next morning to a crash coming from the bathroom. Her eyes flew open at the sound and she shot into a sitting position, listening for more noise. None came. She twisted the comforter off of her and swung her legs over the side of the bed as the previous day's events came screaming back to her. A feeling of anxiety settled within her again as did a tiny budding excitement. Her hand drifted to her stomach again. She gasped lightly as her bare feet hit the hardwood. It was October now, the weather outside was chilly.

She quietly padded over to the bathroom and pushed the door open. Her eyes quickly found the electric razor that had been dropped to the hard, tile floor. The plastic cap of the blades had shot over to the doorway where she stood. Then she froze. Josh was sitting on the edge of the bathtub, still dressed in his Mets t-shirt, boxers, and mismatching socks. Clutched in his hands, two fingers and a thumb holding up each end, was a pregnancy test.

Donna mentally kicked herself. She'd taken close to five tests last night, wanting to be as sure as possible. Each one of them had given her the blue plus sign. She kept one for evidence to show Josh and the rest she had wrapped in toilet paper and tossed in their bathroom garbage can. She had meant to replace the liner inside the bag before Josh got home, but with so many things on her mind, she'd forgotten.

"Josh," she said slowly, unsure on how to approach the situation. This unsettled her more than anything. Josh and her had already been so in sync before they were ever a couple. Since they'd moved in together, the transition had just been seamless. They read each other's moods like it had been written down in a manual that they had both studied religiously. Now though, Donna didn't know what Josh was feeling.

He was still staring down at the pregnancy test; she noticed how delicately he was holding it. As though if he held on too tight, it might break. He hadn't looked up at her words, she wasn't sure if he'd even heard her. The light from the window was illuminating his still very scruffy face and the familiar fear she felt last night returned. He looked so tired recently.

"Josh?" she said again, a little louder this time. Donna's hands were hidden among the sleeves of one of Josh's old, too-big Harvard sweaters. She had them clasped together tightly and hovering just over her heart.

Josh's head snapped up, clearly only just noticing she was there. Their eyes met and Donna noticed that his seemed damp. Josh glanced down at the test and back up at Donna a few times before stuttering.

"The shaving cream cap f-fell in the garbage and I went to fish it out and..." he trailed off, looking down again. Donna moved to sit next to him on the bathtub.

"Is this why you were up last night?" Josh asked as she sat down. Donna nodded.

"You should have told me," Josh muttered, almost not loud enough for Donna to hear.

"You were exhausted last night," Donna said helplessly. "I swear I didn't mean for you to find out like this."

"Yeah," Josh agreed, distracted. He was still looking down at the test when suddenly he smirked and he turned to look at her.

"Holy shit," he said simply. There was a small smile on his lips.

"Surprise," Donna said faintly.

There was more silence. "Are you okay? I know this wasn't planned and the timing isn't exactly ideal," she began after a moment.

Josh paused before coming back to hold her gaze, he looked at her in disbelief

"Am I okay?" he repeated. "Donna, I'm ecstatic!" His face broke out into a huge grin, both dimples on show. Donna felt her whole body melt in relief and she turned to him, a hand on his wrist.

"Yeah?" she asked, her eyes wide. Josh had a look of wonder on his face, like this tiny, plastic pregnancy test held every secret to the world and had just told him every one of them.

"I mean," he started, drifting off a bit. His eyes snapped back to attention. "I don't think I've ever been more scared in my life, but, yeah." He smiled again.

"You?"

"Terrified," Donna agreed with a laugh. "But thrilled."

"Wow," Josh said. He looked like a little boy, Donna thought. A look of pure wonder on his face and yet, she could see the fear there too.

"Have you been getting sick in the morning?" Josh asked suddenly, looking guilty. "How have I missed that?"

"In the evenings actually," Donna replied.

"You get morning sickness in the evenings?" Josh asked, his face twisted in confusion.

"Apparently," Donna said not amused. Her bouts of nausea usually came around the time she was wrapping things up in the office.

"I've been in those damn Kazakhstan meetings," Josh began, the look of guilt deepening. "I'm so sorry. I should have been there to help."

Donna waved him away and stood up and began walking to the sink.

"You didn't know."

She had a smile on her face and she realized how much lighter she felt now. The anxiety that had been eating away at her stomach was quickly dissipating into excitement. Knowing now that Josh was excited meant she allowed herself to indulge in her own more. Josh, still sitting on the side of the tub, reached for her hand and pulled her back to him. She laughed as he lifted her sweater and started inspecting her stomach. He squinted at it, lightly tracing a finger across it.

"I'm not showing yet," she replied simply, her hands settling on her lower back.

Josh laughed softly, "I wanted to make sure I hadn't missed it or something." He stood up and moved his hands higher.

"I knew I was noticing something up here though."

Donna laughed out right and smacked his hands away. Josh smiled cheekily at her and pulled his hands out of her sweater. He settled them on both sides of her face before kissing her slowly.

"I love you," he whispered as he pulled away. Donna beamed at him and her eyes suddenly filled with tears.

"Come on," Josh said, grabbing her hand. "Let's get you and the kid some breakfast." The corner of his lip twitched as the gravity of that sentence settle over both of them. He started pulling her gently towards the door. She didn't move right away and he turned to see her pulling a hand back to start dabbing at her eyes with the sleeves of her sweater.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," she sniffed, a smile on her lips.

"Come on," Josh said again. He took her into the bedroom where sunlight was streaming in through the cracks between the drapes covering the windows; dust motes were floating lazily through the beams of light. Donna's free hand found it's way to her pocket and she realized the test from last night was still in there. She wrapped her fingers around it and clutched it tight, but this time in excitement instead of fear. They were going to be just fine.


	2. Chapter 2

They were both sat at the kitchen table, a plate of eggs and toast in front of them. Josh was taking a sip of coffee when he glanced at Donna doing the same.

"Wait. Aren't you not supposed to have coffee?"

Donna's eyes widened and she spat out the mouthful she had back into the cup.

"Shit. How did you even know that?"

"Margaret ensured that I knew that when she was pregnant last year," Josh explained with a grimace. Donna leaned forward with a groan and put her head in her hands.

"We're so unprepared."

"We got like nine months to figure it out," Josh said unconcerned, returning to the paper he was reading.

"Seven."

"...Okay, seven."

"Stop being so calm about this."

Josh smirked and took a sip of coffee, an insufferable look on his face.

"I'm calling the doctor now," Donna stated, needing to put herself into motion.

"Donna, it's 6 a.m. are they even going to be open yet?" Donna turned, the phone in her hand.

"No," she pouted. She drudged over to the table again and sat down. Her frown deepened when she looked over at Josh who was smirking to himself as he read the paper.

"What."

"Nothing."

"Tell me."

"It's nothing!"

Donna threw a piece of toast at him and Josh laughed.

"It's just kinda funny to see you panicking like this."

"Funny how," Donna replied, her voice dangerously low.

"I don't know! You're just always so organized and everything is scheduled four months in advance and now look at you," Josh ended with a smile on his face again.

"Yes, now look at me. Unmarried and pregnant. Whose fault is that, Joshua?"

"Okay, well I was working on the marriage thing at least," Josh replied meekly.

Donna glared at him and walked over to the sink to pour out her cup of coffee.

"Shit," he said aloud suddenly, putting down his mug. Donna leaned against the sink and looked at him.

"What?"

"Mary Marsh."

Donna's eyebrows creased in confusion.

"We're not married yet," Josh explained, leaning forward with his elbows on the table. "The right is gonna try and make something out of this."

"Oh, come on," Donna said lightly. Josh gave her a pointed look, eyebrows raised.

"Mary Marsh hates me Donna."

"Well... yeah."

"I don't want this becoming a distraction to the administration"

Donna bristled slightly.

"I don't want to think about Mary Marsh right now."

"I don't EVER want to think about Mary Marsh," Josh replied. "But we might have to."

"We're already engaged, shouldn't that be enough?"

"Probably not for some people," Josh sighed as he started rubbing a hand across his forehead. "They're going to try and score points wherever they can."

"They won't care," Donna started, but Josh cut her off.

"Donna, there hasn't been nearly enough scandal coming out of this White House, they've been waiting for something to sink their teeth into."

"Our baby isn't a scandal, Josh," Donna said coldly. She started to walk towards the stairs.

"Donna-"

But Donna kept walking out of the room. Josh ran a frustrated hand through his hair and blew out a sigh before gathering up the rest of the dishes on the table and depositing them in the sink alongside Donna's.

He found her in their bedroom laying out clothes for the day.

"Look, I'm sorry to bring it up, but it's important. There are going to be ripple effects when this news gets out and as much as I don't understand it or care for it, people are going to care about this."

Their relationship was hardly front-page news anymore, but there was still a keen fascination from the public about their relationship. The President and First Lady having matching his and hers Chief of Staffs was a constant feature in DC gossip columns. Magazines all wanted their attention and Josh and Donna had refused all press inquires. That is until they had passed the education bill they had all worked so hard on for the first year of the administration. Wanting to solidify their win, Josh and Donna appeared together on the cover of Time. They had stood side by side with their arms crossed in matching suits on the cover, Donna leaning her shoulder slightly against Josh. Josh was caught looking down at her with a smirk on his face as she smiled at the camera.

It was hardly their idea. It had been Lou who had badgered them about it for weeks until they finally caved. They did not care for the interview much, neither liked talking about themselves and as much as they tried to lead the questions back to their education plan, they were eventually pressed into releasing some personal details. Josh had spoken about how proud he was of her; Donna spoke about how they always ensure they have date night at least once a week, even if it just meant they curled up on the sofa for a movie. The public had loved it and Lou was smug. And as much as Josh and Donna complained about it, each of them had the cover framed and set up on their office walls.

"Can't we get one day to just enjoy this as just us before we have to start worrying about everyone else?" Donna tossed down her blazer with a little extra force before walking back to the closet. Josh stared at her.

"Sorry," he muttered. "It's my job, y'know? I have to think about this stuff"

"I know," Donna replied softly.

Around 4 p.m., Donna heard a knock at her door before Josh let himself in.

"Hey," he called happily, grinning wide at her.

She smiled back, a little suspicious.

"Hey."

Josh situated himself in one of the visitor chairs opposite Donna's desk.

"How was your day? You feeling okay? How's the uh, how's the baby?"

"Baby's fine. Same as this morning."

"Okay listen," Josh began. Donna leaned forward, both forearms resting on the desk.

"I have an idea."

"Oh god."

"Shut up," Josh laughed.

"Let's get married this weekend."

Donna stared at him, waiting for the punch line.

"Donna?"

"You're serious?"

"Yes...? Are you forgetting we're engaged?"

"Are you forgetting we haven't planned a wedding?"

"Ah," Josh replied. "I have a plan."

"Which is?"

"Let's drive to Maine, to that place you saw in that magazine that you really loved."

"French's Point?"

"Yes!"

"You remembered that?" Donna asked softly.

"Yeah," Josh smiled. "Let's go. Just us, we can avoid all the stress of guest lists and bands and seating arrangements."

Donna smiled, she didn't hate the idea.

"What about our parents?" Josh's smile faltered.

"Mom's gonna be pissed, but I figured we can soften the blow when we tell her there's a baby coming."

"She's going to be so happy," Donna conceded, her chest warmed when she imagined telling Mrs. Lyman the news.

"Yeah, I think she thought she was going to end up grandchild-less until you came around."

"People are going to mad they weren't invited to the wedding, Josh."

"Screw people," Josh replied. He stood up and started gesticulating. "It's our wedding. It's about us, not them. Besides, we both know we've been putting it off because of how long it's going to take to plan. This way we can cut out the hassle and just enjoy each other."

"And avoid a press problem when they find out I'm pregnant?" Donna asked.

Josh smiled innocently.

"I'm not saying it doesn't solve multiple problems. I thought you said you wanted a small wedding," he continued softly.

"That would be nice."

A silence fell over them until Donna asked, "How are you going to get us in this weekend? Isn't this place booked solid for like a year or two?" Josh shrugged smugly, propping his feet on Donna's desk.

"I know a guy." Donna rolled her eyes and reached over to push his feet off the desk.

"You're going to be able to get away for a whole weekend?" Josh's smile faltered slightly.

"I'll make it happen."

"My mom's going to be so pissed."

"Are you saying yes?" Josh leaned forward.

"Maybe," Donna stretched out the syllables of the word.

"Donna!"

She laughed.

"Yes."

Josh's face broke out into a wide grin and he reached over the desk to pull her in hard for a kiss. After they broke apart several seconds later, he turned to leave.

"I've got a meeting, but I'll meet you here after and we'll go home and then drive, okay?"

"Okay," Donna couldn't help the giddy excitement that was building up in her stomach now.

"Don't tell anyone!" Josh said with hands out, he was walking slowly backwards towards the door now.

"Fine."

"This is for the best you know," he said as he reached the door.

"Oh yeah?" Donna replied, seeing the smirk on Josh's face.

"You're not going to be able to fit into a dress soon anyways." He slipped out the door just before the stress ball sitting on Donna's desk would have been nailing him in the forehead.


	3. Chapter 3

Josh and Donna were sitting side by side on the beach, watching the sun set over the horizon. There was a beautiful melding of colors across the sky in front of them. Yellows, purples, and reds were all swirling together lazily to create the magnificent glow engulfing both the sky and the water. The scent of salt on the air was thick. It coated their faces and skin in a way Josh found nostalgic and Donna found refreshing. The tide roll rhythmically in and out, the noise comfortingly consistent. Josh's hair had curled even more at the ends and Donna reached out a hand to brush it out of his eyes.

"So do you feel any different now?" Josh asked, his eyes bright and reflecting the sunset in front of them.

"Not really," Donna laughed, her hands still playing with his hair. "You?"

"Nah." Josh leaned back on his hands and looked out at the ocean again, his legs stretched out in front of him. They were both still dressed in their makeshift wedding clothes, on the coast of Maine. Donna was wearing a simple white dress with lace piping around the edge while Josh was dressed in a pair of dress pants and simple white dress shirt with a skinny, pale purple tie. His sleeves were rolled up and shoes were off, revealing his striped socks.

Donna shifted positions so that she was perpendicular to Josh with her legs bent at the knee and her head resting on his stomach, tilted slightly so she could look out over the water.

"So how do we tell people without them getting all pissy with us," Josh asked. He raised one hand out in front of him and started inspecting the new ring on his left hand closely.

"I think they're going to be mad either way," Donna replied, her eyes looking up and watching Josh's hand now.

"Do we announce it to them or just let them find out on their own?"

Donna laughed, imagining everyone's reactions.

"We'll tell them. We'll do a joint senior staff meeting."

"Kay," Josh replied simply. He was smiling.

"What?" Donna asked. Josh looked down at her.

"Nothin'."

"Josh."

Josh's hand strayed to Donna's still flat stomach.

"I'm just happy." Donna felt a warm glow cover her.

"Me too," she smiled, resting her own hand over Josh's.

"Okay, everyone," Josh called from the head of the room; the dull roar filling the room dwindled to a soft murmur. Donna was stood next to Josh, looking at him with anticipation, her hands were held behind her back.

"How was the weekend away?" Otto asked curiously.

"Shocked you guys managed to keep the building in tact while I was gone," Josh replied smoothly.

"It was only a weekend!" Otto replied, a glint in his eye.

"Must be the only reason we haven't rejoined with England while I was gone," Josh continued. The room sniggered and then turned as they heard the door open. An aide stepped in and went to whisper something in Donna's ear. After a moment, Donna nodded and then squeezed Josh's arm before whispering. "Be right back."

"So anything to report on from this weekend?" Josh asked the group, after watching Donna leave.

"Well oiled machine, Joshua," Lou replied.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"We haven't gone to war with Canada?"

"Not yet," Sam spoke up from next to Lou. Josh gave a snort of laughter and rubbed a hand across his forehead.

"Whoa, Josh what did you get up to this weekend?" Bram asked. His eyes were locked on the ring on Josh's left hand.

"What?"

"Nice ring."

Josh looked down at it and then quickly at the door before shoving his hand in his pocket.

"You got married!?" Annabeth cried. The room immediately broke into chaos as everyone jumped at once to question Josh on the details.

When Donna walked in a few minutes later, the hyenas quickly pulled her into the feeding frenzy.

"How could you just get married and not tell us?" Lester asked.

"We-" Donna began

"Or invite us?" Sam interrupted bitterly from his seat. Josh looked up to see him with his arms crossed, looking unhappy.

"Don't start, Sam," Josh said to him with a small smile.

"CJ's gonna be pissed too," Sam told him bluntly.

"Yeah, well," Josh drifted off. "Alright yes, everyone, if you would all shut up and take your seats again."

The room settled back into normalcy.

"Yes, Donna and I got married this weekend," Josh announced to the room.

"We're sorry you weren't invited," Donna said apologetically. "We kind of just wanted to have it be just us without all the White House fuss."

"We're going to have to release a statement," Lou told them.

"Yeah."

"People are going to ask why you got married so suddenly and didn't invite anyone," Lou continued.

"Yeah, we just wanted it to be private and without all the political fuss. We both finally had a free weekend," Donna replied. She and Josh both shifted uncomfortably at the lie and Donna noticed Sam's eyebrows go up slightly. Donna groaned silently to herself. Sam probably got the meetings Josh had to cancel.

"Should get us some decent press," Lou said after a moment with a shrug.

"Anyways, we ready to move on?"

"Don't we get to see any pictures?" Annabeth asked glumly.

"I'll show you some later," Donna promised. They exchanged a look and Annabeth smiled wide.

The meeting then kicked on as usual. Both staff's coordinating messages and consulting with each other. An hour later as everyone filed out of the room, Sam hung back to walk with Josh and Donna, who were the last out of the room.

"I can't believe you guys didn't invite me to your wedding! I'm your best friend," he huffed.

"No congratulations?" Josh asked shortly.

"I said it!"

Josh and Donna exchanged a look.

"I mean, congratulations! But come on! I've been there from the start! I've had to watch you guys making eyes at each other for god knows how long and the fact that you didn't want to invite me to your wedding is just hurtful. After all we've been through together, after how long we've known each other-"

"Alright, Sam." Josh had roughly grabbed Sam by the arm and pushed him into an empty conference room as they were walking. Donna followed them and closed the door. Josh sat Sam down at the main table.

"I didn't even get to throw you a bachelor party," Sam continued to pout.

"Thank God," Donna muttered.

"Sam, we're sorry we didn't invite you. I don't want you to go around the office making a fuss about this," Josh started. He and Donna looked at each other and silently came to an agreement.

"The thing is, it was sort of a time sensitive issue," Donna said.

"Time sensitive?" Sam asked, baffled.

"Yeah. We wanted to get married as soon as possible."

"But why?"

"Sam," Josh almost laughed. He turned away and ran a hand through his hair.

"Read between the lines," Donna insisted, desperate for Sam to get there on his own.

"I don't-"

"Donna's pregnant, Sam," Josh interrupted. "That's why we got married so fast. We just found out."

Sam's jaw fell open and though his mouth was moving, no words were coming out.

"We figured it would be better be married before we told people so the right couldn't... y'know," Josh explained.

Another moment of silence passed between the trio. Then Josh and Donna watched as a smile grew on Sam's face.

"Wow," he stood up. "This is incredible!" He stepped forward and hugged Josh tightly and after a moment, he moved to hug Donna close.

"Congratulations," he told them earnestly. They both smiled back.

"You can't tell anyone though, Sam."

"How far along are you?" Sam asked, looking to Donna.

"Only a couple months."

"How long before you tell people?"

"Two months. Apparently after that stage it's safer to tell people."

"Safer?"

"Yeah, in case. Y'know. Something happens," Josh said quietly. The small feeling of dread that had begun to grow in Josh's stomach grew a little larger at the thought of something happening to the baby.

"So will you stop being mad at us for not inviting you to the wedding?" Donna asked gently.

Sam nodded. "I'm sorry."

"No problem, buddy." Josh clapped him on the back.

"Wow, you're gonna be a DAD," Sam said in amazement as he stood up.

"I know," Josh said, a little dazed at the notion.

"You don't seem to be freaking out?" Sam turned to Donna, who shrugged.

"He's surprisingly relaxed about this."

"We'll give him time," Sam said over his shoulder as he started towards the door.

Donna chuckled and Josh pulled a face, but said nothing.

Hand on the doorknob, Sam turned to look at them.

"I'm really happy for you guys," he smiled. Josh and Donna smiled back and Josh sat back against the table as Sam left the room. He looked at Donna.

"Well, that wasn't a total disaster."

"It wasn't great."

"No."

"Now we just gotta tell the Preisdent and First Lady," Josh said.

"I feel like the swarm we just dealt with will be worse."

"Probably." Josh took her hand and led her to the door. He gave her a quick kiss before walking out into the hallway.

"I'll see you later." He resisted the urge to touch Donna's stomach as he left.

"Bye," Donna replied, also resisting moving her own hand to her stomach.

"Josh?"

Josh glanced up from the note he was scribbling on a notepad, a hand to his forehead.

"What's up?"

"The President would like to see you in 10 minutes," Margaret replied.

Josh turned his wrist to glace at his watch and nodded.

"Kay. Thanks, Margaret."

He looked up a few seconds later when Margaret was still standing there expectantly.

"You need something?"

Margaret's limbs flailed lightly as she sighed.

"Would it be so hard for you to at least show me some pictures from the wedding?"

A smirk appeared on Josh's lips and he sat up straighter, pulling his phone out of his pocket. He opened up to the photos page and slid it over the desk to Margaret who snapped it up eagerly.

"You got actual photos too though right?" she asked seriously after a moment.

Josh rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, the inn had a guy." Margaret just nodded and continued going through the photos. After a moment, Josh went back to writing.

"Wish I could have gone," Margaret said, not bothering to hide the bitterness in her voice

"Sorry," Josh said shortly.

"We have known each other a long time now," Margaret continued.

"Well nobody else got to go either if that makes you feel better."

"Not really."

They stared at each other for a moment and then Margaret put Josh's phone back on the desk and turned away to the door.

"Margaret," Josh called out as she shut the door on her way out. He grumbled to himself. The list of people upset at not being invited was growing by the hour.

Seven or so minutes later, Josh was walking into the Oval Office. He was surprised to find Donna perched on the couch next to The First Lady, looking nervous. The President was sitting in his customary chair.

"Hi," Josh said a little awkwardly. He sat on the sofa opposite the girls, to the President's left. He made eye contact with Donna and saw her give a small shrug.

"What's going on?" Josh asked, looking to the President. Though he had a feeling.

"It seems like congratulations are in order. A little birdy told us you two got married this weekend," Matt began bluntly.

Josh and Donna exchanged worried looks.

"We were going to tell you at the meeting later-" Josh began. Matt waved his hands.

"You didn't want to get married here?" Matt asked.

"Well-"

"You know who I got a call from about half an hour ago?"

"No, sir."

"President Bartlet," Matt said, not sounding amused. "And he scolded me for allowing you to have a wedding in which he and Abbey weren't invited."

Josh and Donna exchanged sheepish looks.

"How did he already find out?" Josh asked, sounding amazed.

"News travels fast," Helen answered.

"We were looking forward to it you know," Matt pushed on. "Having the wedding here."

Josh was taken aback by this, touched.

"You were?"

"It's not every day your Chief of Staff gets married to your wife's Chief of Staff," Matt said with a shrug. Josh smiled. He and Matt had come a long way in the two years they'd been in the White House together. They genuinely enjoyed each other's company these days and the two couples would often have dinner together. Matt had thoroughly enjoyed the funnier, cheerier Josh Lyman that came out when Josh got together with Donna.

Josh had even forged a relationship with the Santos children, much to their parents' surprise. Peter would find himself hanging out in Josh's office a few times a month, talking to Josh while he worked. Josh didn't mind. Miranda also took a liking to Josh. The two of them had a love of baseball and Miranda would talk Josh's ear off about school. Josh would often help her with her English and history homework when she tagged along with Peter to his office. Josh had an easy way with the kids.

Donna's relationship with Helen had taken off right from the get go. They were always comfortable in each other's company and Helen appreciated Donna's subtle touch as she decided what kind of First Lady she really wanted to be. Though Donna wasn't as close to the kids as Josh was, she was still comfortable in their company.

"I know Miranda is going to be crushed she wasn't able to be flower girl," Helen told Josh and Donna. A frown came to Josh's face. He faintly remembered promising Miranda she could be their flower girl at the wedding. Guilt started to flicker in his stomach.

Matt watched them exchange guilty looks before continuing on.

"We think you should have another wedding here at the White House."

"Sir-"

"That way we don't step on anyone's toes. Nobody gets upset they weren't invited. Well, less people will get upset and I won't be scolded by the former President about not getting him an invitation."

"We-"

"We can get someone else to plan it," Helen interrupted. "I'm sure that's why you eloped right?"

Josh and Donna exchanged another dubious look.

"I don't-"

"We'll use the woman who designed all the bedrooms," Helen continued. "She'll be thrilled at the opportunity."

"All you two really have to do is show up," Matt said with a finality that said this plan was already happening whether Josh and Donna liked it or not. "And I won't have a crying nine-year-old upset she didn't get to be flower girl."

"But-"

"I'll help you pick out your dress," Helen insisted, resting a hand on top of Donna's.

"Maybe something with an empire waist," Donna muttered.

"Excuse me?" Matt asked.

"When were you planning to have this wedding?" Josh asked, diverting their attention.

"In a couple months maybe?"

Josh and Donna looked at each other.

"Might wanna move it up a bit."

"What?" Matt asked. "Why?"

"Um," Josh started.

A split second later Helen gasped.

"Oh my god," she whispered. She turned to Donna and grabbed her hands. "Are you?"

"Is she what?"

Donna smiled shyly and nodded.

"Donna!" Helen cried out happily and pulled Donna in for a hug.

Matt just looked at Josh, baffled.

"Donna's pregnant," Josh supplied, smiling.

Matt's face broke out into a large grin.

"You're kidding."

"No, sir."

Matt stood up and pulled Josh up to give him a hug.

"Congratulations, Josh," he said warmly.

"Thank you, sir," Josh replied, beaming.

"So that's why you got married so fast," Helen laughed.

"We didn't want to give the right an excuse," Josh muttered darkly, retaking his seat.

"How far along are you, Donna?" Helen asked eagerly.

"Only two months," Donna replied. "We weren't going to tell anyone yet."

"Of course. Well, we can do this wedding in a month!" Helen said optimistically. "You won't be showing much if at all until your fourth month anyways, Donna."

"Do we have to?" Josh asked, trying desperately to keep the whine out of his voice.

"President Bartlet didn't really give us an option, Josh," Matt said with a tight smile.

Josh groaned.

"He's gonna want to give a speech."

"You say that like it's a bad thing?" Helen said.

Josh and Donna looked at each other before turning to Helen.

"You have no idea."

"It's decided then!" Matt said, clapping his hands together. "We'll have another White House ceremony."

"I'd rather not distract the staff with something so-"

"There's going to be a wedding, Josh," Matt insisted. "But we'll get someone else to plan it, deal?"

Josh looked at Donna again, question in his eyes.

"I guess so," Donna said, relenting.

"Excellent!" Matt cried, getting up and moving to his desk. "Let's get planning."


	4. Chapter 4

Notes:

So this ended up having way more Sam in it than I anticipated (somewhere Meli is upset about this) but I just really love Sam and Josh's friendship. Reviews are always appreciated, but never expected. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter Text

Sam walked back to his office after a meeting with a few Congressmen on the Hill and was surprised to find the Chief of Staff sitting in his chair. His feet propped up on the desk, but his head tilted towards the window. He didn't notice Sam come in.

"You lost?" Sam asked him, dropping his stuff on the desk next to Josh's feet with a loud bang. Josh jumped and spun around.

"Not exactly," Josh replied airily. Sam noticed Josh had a far away look on his face.

"Don't you have a million important things to be doing right now?"

Josh shrugged and sniffed.

"You okay?" Sam asked.

Josh returned to looking out the window of the office.

"Just thinkin."

"About Donna?"

"It's weird being in here."

"You guys spent a lot of time in here together," Sam smiled wistfully.

"Yeah," Josh replied with that faraway look in his eye again. He was thinking about all the lunches he would spend in this room with Donna, all the times Donna would tie his bow tie, all the little moments that solidified his relationship with Donna within these four walls. The way she would steal his french fries, the way she would lift his feet up off the desk without saying a word to him to get to a folder trapped underneath, the way they would tag team writing down the names of different Congressmen and Senators on the blackboard and pretend they weren't racing.

"Josh? Can I help you with something?"

Josh's stare out the window broke and he turned to Sam. After a moment he replied. "Yeah, sure. I uh, meant to ask earlier I guess, but will you be my best man for the wedding?"

Sam froze.

"Really?"

Josh looked amused as Sam fell into one of the visitors' chairs. The irony wasn't lost on Josh that he was sitting in Sam's chair in his old office. If he closed his eyes he could almost imagine this conversation taking place years earlier.

"Of course. Who else would I pick?" Sam looked shy, looking up at Josh from behind his glasses, but pleased.

"I'd be honored, Josh."

"What you think I'd ask Toby or something?"

Sam shrugged. "I don't know, you guys have the Jewish thing. I thought you might."

"I'm not sure Toby even likes me enough to say yes." Josh said with a self-deprecating laugh. He paused. "The whole Jewish thing?"

"Stop," Sam scolded lightly.

Josh stood. "So you'll do it?"

"Of course," Sam smiled proudly. Josh smiled back and patted him on the shoulder as he left the office.

"Will I make a speech?" Sam asked as he moved back to his desk chair. Josh paused in the doorway, a hand on the door jam.

"If you want, I guess."

Sam rested his fingers on the handle of one of his desk drawers.

"Yeah, I think I will."

The East Room of the West Wing was covered in string lights that glowed dimly against all of the white drapery crisscrossing across the walls. The room was dressed elegantly, transformed into a makeshift alter. There were too many chairs to count, with all the occupants of those chairs currently awing at the six-year old Ziegler twins walking down the aisle, performing their joint role as ring bearer flawlessly. Behind them was Miranda Santos, looking thrilled to finally get her chance to be flower girl. Josh was waiting at the top of the aisle standing next to Sam, hands held tightly behind his back.

"She's certainly thorough," Josh muttered to Sam. Miranda was taking her time throwing each individual flower petal to the ground. As they reached him, Sam corralled Molly and Huck in front of him and took the rings and eventually Miranda found her way to the other side of the aisle.

Then the room turned its attention back to the end of the aisle, where Donna now stood arm in arm with her father. Even though Josh had married her once before only a few weeks ago, he still couldn't help but feel overwhelmed at the sight of her dressed in white again. Her dress this time was more glamorous, but to Josh it felt just the same as watching her walk down the aisle in Maine. He felt the same overwhelming feeling of luck as he watched the woman he loved walk towards him. Josh spared a quick look towards President Santos and suddenly felt eternally grateful that he had forced Josh and Donna into this. Not that Josh wanted the attention or the glamour, but he was happy for Donna to get to experience this moment with her family and friends. He was happy to see his mother in the front row, tears quickly gathering in his eyes.

His eyes glanced down to Donna's stomach, hidden by an expanse of white fabric, and his smile grew wider, and his eyes filled with unexpected tears. The next thing he knew, Donna was standing right next to him. She grabbed his hand and he then pulled her hand to his lips to place a soft kiss on top of it. Together they turned to face Chief Justice Lang and went through the same motions they did in Maine all over again.

Sam stood up from his seat next to Josh at the head table. The room was bustling with talk and discussion as they ate the second course of their meals. He clinked his glass a few times and the room came to a halt, everyone turning to him expectantly.

"Hi," Sam began, more nervous than he anticipated. "I'm Sam Seaborn, best man."

Sam saw a few of their friends roll their eyes. C.J. wasn't even trying to be subtle about it. Of course everyone in the room knew who he was.

He chuckled nervously before continuing on. He glanced down at Josh who looked only mildly concerned at the speech to come. Josh had both hands enveloped around one of Donna's.

"I'm not so used to being the one giving the speech as opposed to the one who just wrote it, so bear with me," Sam said with a small smile. He heard a not so subtle "hah!" come from President Bartlet's table and the room filled with laugher.

"Back in August 2000, I was with President Bartlet and the rest of the staff for a town hall the President was doing in Rosslyn, Virginia."

Sam paused for a moment as an obvious shudder rippled through the crowd. He took a deep breath and looked back at his crinkled piece of paper he was reading off of. He tried, unsuccessfully, to flatten it out a few times.

"After a successful event, we all filed out into the open air and as many of you may remember, we were shot at by two gunmen from a nearby building. President Bartlet was shot in the abdomen, another woman was shot in the leg, and Joshua Lyman was shot in the chest."

Sam paused again, taking another deep breath. He glanced down at Josh who was frowning slightly; unsure of where Sam was taking the speech. Rosslyn was not a topic any of those affected by the event had liked talking about.

"Being a writer, one of the ways I've always used to cope and get through hard times, is to articulate my thoughts through language and prose. While we waited 14 hours for Josh to get through the surgery to try to repair the damage to a major artery and his lungs, I found myself restless, impatient and impossibly scared. So I started to write while we waited out the night and I found myself writing to Josh himself."

Sam saw C.J. look down at her lap from the corner of his eye. He tried to flatten out his piece of paper again.

"I wrote about our friendship and what he meant to me and all of his friends. For the full 14 hours Josh was in surgery I would continually come back to this piece of paper and add to it, trying my best to articulate all the feelings and emotions that were running through not only me, but the entire administration and the world that night. Thanks to a miracle and the brilliantly talented surgical team at GW hospital. I never had to use this letter as an obituary, but after that night, I always told myself I would give this to Josh at some point. I thought it was important that he knew how important his friendship was to the people around him. I put the letter in a drawer, planning to give it to him when he was recovered, but then life took over and it was forgotten about. Tonight I would like to use this letter to honor my best friend."

The room was so utterly silent, you could have heard a pin drop. Sam took a moment to glance around the room again, his eyes settled on Donna and he saw her staring back with wide eyes, eyes coated with a sheen of unshed tears. He glanced at Josh again who looked touched, but whose mouth was drawn in a thin line of anxiety and Sam felt his chest tighten. He adjusted his glasses and then squeezed Josh's shoulder before returning to read off his wrinkled piece of paper.

"Dear Josh,

I'm sitting in the waiting room of GW Hospital right now. You're still in surgery and have been for some time. Bartlet staff members, our friends, surround me. In reality, I guess this is really our family; our makeshift, crazy found family that neither of us really expected to have. I remember when we were lonely Congressional aids on the Hill making coffee runs together, we used to talk about how we both had wished we had come from big families. I think we ended up in one big family without either of us really ever noticing. The way C.J. yells at us, you could certainly believe she was our big sister."

The room broke out into soft laughter at this, especially from those who had been around to experience C.J.'s wrath at Sam and Josh's expense.

"And then there's Toby, the older brother who you think hates you until he's walking up to the bully in your class with a roll of pennies clutched in his fist." Sam raised his head to glance at Toby sitting at the back of the room. He was too far away to really register Toby's reaction, but Sam felt defiant He hoped the room's occupants saw this for what it was, Sam was defending Toby's honor in a room full of people who might still resent him for what he did.

"If you were here right now, I think you'd actually be touched by how worried he is, but then you'd probably make a joke at Toby's expense and Toby would say something, exceedingly cruel back and you'd brush it off and move on with a smile like you always do. I keep expecting you to do that. Walk through the door, make a joke at our expense and then smile as we nag and berate you for it. You're always good at bringing people together like that. You don't let things get to you and it helps put everyone else at ease. We might be a bit of a makeshift family with two dads and a mom who is constantly nagging us to get check ups and to stop eating junk food, but it works. Somehow. We've picked up a few neighborhood kids along the way in Donna and Charlie, but they've fit right in."

Sam paused again with a light smile and glanced over at Josh and Donna, who were watching expectantly.

"One might even guess that you have a crush on the blonde from down the street, Josh."

The room erupted into gentle laughter again. Sam laughed along with them and fiddled with the corner of the paper. Josh squeezed Donna's hand and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"And as I sit here looking around at our family, I'm struck by the realization that we wouldn't be here without you. In the truest sense, Donna and I at the very least wouldn't be here. You held out hands and dragged us into this crazy White House with a promise that we could make the world a better place and you show us every day why fighting for that is important. Not only us though, Charlie, who has become such an integral part of our group wouldn't be here without you. It was you that who decided to bring him on board, you that knew our family needed another member. And then there's C.J. and Toby, you didn't recruit either of them, but because Leo recruited you, this team of ours made it all the way to the White House and that's no small feat."

Sam took a deep breath, trying not to let emotion tarnish his voice.

"So I guess what all this rambling means, is thank you. Thank you for being the lynchpin that brings this family together, thank you for my friends that I wouldn't have found without you, thank you for your friendship. And although this room is filled with such fear and sadness at the moment, I hope one day you will get to understand that beneath this heavy layer of grief, is a feeling of such love. Love for you and the friendship and life you bring to all of us. Your laughter, your advice, your clumsiness. The way you enjoy nothing better than fighting with Republicans. Your secret plan to fight inflation. All of the things that are so quintessentially Josh are the things we are holding on so tightly to right now as we pray that you make it through the night.

C.J. just came by to tell me that you're out of surgery, so we're headed to the hospital. Thank you for hanging on.

Love always, Sam."

The silent room was now spoiled by the sound of sniffing noses and Sam looked up to see many guests dabbing at their eyes. He made eyes contact with C.J. who put her hands over her heart. Sam looked towards the back of the room and could make out Toby, a hand propping up his head and covering his mouth. President Bartlet looked like he was trying to hold back tears and Sam cleared his throat.

"Josh showed up at my law firm in New York City all those years ago to recruit me for the Bartlet campaign and then eight years later, in the same fashion, he burst into a meeting and pulled me along with him for his next grand adventure with President Santos. Just like the first administration he served in, Josh was the architect of another family. So if I could get everyone to raise their glasses." Sam grabbed his own from beside him on the table.

"I'd like to raise a glass to Josh Lyman. Thank you for the families and friends you have given to me and I can't tell you how happy it makes me to see you finally happy with the girl next door you invited into all our lives all those years ago, ready to start a family of your own. I'm thankful every day that you're still here. To Josh!"

The room repeated it with gusto. "To Josh!" And then broke out into applause and Sam retook his seat. He saw Donna dabbing at her eyes furiously and even saw Josh's eyes were looking especially wet.

"How'd I do?" Sam asked. Josh punched him in the shoulder before pulling him in for a hug.

"You really wrote that on the night of Rosslyn?"

"Yeah," Sam answered, he folded the piece of paper in half and then placed it back in an envelope that had been sitting next to Sam's plate.

"I've been meaning to give it to you for years."

He handed the envelope to Josh, who let go of Donna's hand to grasp it with both of his own. He held it out in front of him, not quite sure what to do with it.

"I don't think I want this."

"I've been meaning to give it to you for years."

"Sam-" Donna reached across and grabbed it from his hands.

"You're keeping it."

Before Josh could respond, they heard a clinking glass and they held back groans as they saw who the culprit was. Jed was standing at the center of the room.

"Not again," Josh sighed, putting a hand to his face.

"This is the third speech," Donna said, she couldn't help the smile on her face. Her head was still nuzzled into Josh's shoulder as the night began to take its toll.

"I think he misses the spotlight," Sam chuckled. Before Jed started his speech, Sam turned to Josh and Donna.

"I love you guys. I'm so happy for you." Josh and Donna smiled warmly back at him and Donna reached out to affectionately fix Sam's bowtie.

"Thanks for the speech, Sam."

The three of them sat back as Jed started another speech on love, but ended up on a tangent about some obscure trivia fact that only really Donna knew about. Sam caught a glimpse of Josh's hand as it subtly strayed to Donna's stomach and felt a warm feeling spread through his body. He then found himself watching Josh, taking in the sight of his chest rising and falling. Josh was oblivious, watching President Barlet speak and Sam realized that to this day, the sight of Josh's chest rising and falling still reassured him. After a full night spent with Donna in the hospital watching to make sure Josh's breathing never stopped, Sam made sure to never again take the sight for granted. Returning to the present, Sam smiled and relaxed into his chair to enjoy the night with his family, the one he never expected, but would feel forever grateful to have in his life.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Just a short fluffy chapter.

* * *

Bright sunlight was streaming in through the windows, diffused slightly by the white drapes on the windows. The light stirred a still sleeping Josh into semi-wakefulness. With a groan he rolled over, away from the light and threw an arm over his face grumpily. He blindly reached his other arm across the bed, searching for Donna. When his hand could only find empty space, he opened one eye (as the sun wouldn't permit him to open both) and propped himself up on an elbow. He glanced at Donna's empty spot on the bed for a moment before searching the rest of the room.

He quickly spotted her standing in front of the full-length mirror they had set up in the corner.

"Donna," Josh muttered sleepily. "Come back to bed." His head landed back on the pillow with a soft thunk.

When Donna didn't reply, he looked up again. Donna was staring intently at her reflection in the mirror. Josh rubbed at his eyes and waited a few moments for his eyes to focus. Then he noticed what Donna was staring at. There was a soft swell to Donna's belly causing her tank top to ride up just enough to show about an inch of skin. Josh sat up. She had a hand resting underneath it.

"Whoa." Josh said aloud. Donna turned to look at him with a brilliant smile. Josh quickly moved to get out of bed; he swung his legs over the side and stood up. Unbeknownst to Josh though, the bed sheets had come with him as he swung his legs over the side of the bed and when he tried to take a step, he immediately came crashing down hard to the wood flooring.

Donna tried her best to quell her laughter, but was failing miserably.

"Oww," Josh called out from the floor dramatically. She made her way over to him and giggled more. Josh was completely tangled up in the sheet and his arms were sprawled up above his head. He made no move to try and untangle himself.

"Hi," he said shortly when Donna appeared above him. Donna was still laughing at him. Josh reached a hand up and gently tugged on Donna's. She followed his lead and sat down next to him. With some effort, he finally untangled himself from the sheet and sat up straight with only a small wince.

"How you've made it this far is beyond me," Donna said simply. Josh gave her a sarcastic look, but then his eyes travelled down to her belly. Which sitting down, looked even more pronounced. Josh's eyes lit up.

"Where did that come from?" he asked her, wonder in his voice. Donna sat back on her hands and let Josh reach out a hand to touch her belly. After a moment, Donna broke the silence.

"You know, I was going to ask you the same question," Donna said, her voice dry.

"What?" Josh looked up at her confused; he then followed her eye line to his own stomach and immediately rolled his eyes. In the debacle with the bed sheet, Josh's grey t-shirt had ridden up in much the same manner that Donna's had.

"Are you really going to ruin this moment by lecturing me about my diet right now," Josh asked, annoyance dripping with every word. Donna laughed again.

"It's cute, people will call it sympathy weight now," she said, eyes shining with mirth.

"You're evil," Josh smirked. Without warning, he gabbed her by the sides and pulled her closer before ferociously tickling her. Donna, being extremely ticklish, squirmed wildly and started pounding on Josh's arms. Josh let go quickly with a wild grin on his face and Donna shot backwards defensively, still smiling. They sat there for a moment laughing at each other before Josh spoke up.

"Let me see," he told her, his face a picture of warm affection. He was reaching out his hands towards her. Donna scooted forward across the wood floors and lifted up her tank top fully to reveal a small, but very prominent bump. Josh smiled wide as he placed his hands on her stomach.

"There's a baby in there," he said simply, a goofy grin on his face. Donna laughed again, her cheeks starting to ache.

"And people say you don't pay attention."

"I'll tickle you again, I swear to god, Donna," Josh threatened. Donna put her hand up to her mouth and made the tell tale gesture for silence by locking a pretend key and throwing it away.

"All I've wanted for like, 10 years," Josh said lightly and Donna pushed him backwards.

"You know," she started as she stood up. "I really hope the baby gets my hair." Josh let out a laugh.

"Low blow, Donnatella." Donna smiled at him as she made her way to the bathroom. Josh dutifully followed. He leaned in the door jam as he watched her get ready. Donna glanced at him and couldn't help the warm feeling that spread through her chest. She actually adored Josh's hair in the morning. When it was all over the place and stuck out at funny angles.

"I wouldn't mind if the baby got your curls though," she told him. Josh ran a hand through his hair and grabbed a handful.

"They're a pain in the ass," he muttered.

"They're cute," Donna replied simply.

"So I haven't completely gone to seed then?" Josh asked, crossing his arms.

"No," Donna said slowly. "Not completely." Josh rolled his eyes at her.

"I bought you one of those 'What to Expect' books for you, by the way. The dad version," Donna told him as she started brushing her teeth. She'd had her assistant go out and buy the books yesterday. One for her and one for Josh.

"Oh," Josh said, a little suspicious. "Okay."

"You need to read the book, Joshua," Donna told him sternly, her toothbrush was hanging out of her mouth loosely now as she fiddled with her phone for a moment.

"Am I the one carrying the baby?"

Donna turned to look at him, eyes drifting to his stomach again, before shrugging.

"Debatable."

"Alright, I'll cut back on the donuts!" he said exasperatedly. He self consciously put a hand to the small paunch he had slightly poking out from his shirt before tugging the shirt down forcefully. Donna laughed and shook her head as she finished brushing her teeth.

"Read the book, Josh." Donna turned away towards the medicine cabinet.

"I'll read the book," he told her seriously. He walked towards her and caught her by surprised as he put his hands on either side of her waist. He nuzzled her neck lightly before muttering. "I love you." After a beat. "Even though you're mean to me."

Donna turned and kissed him hard before moving away. "I love you too." She patted his belly affectionately as she made her way past him and out of the bathroom.

"Donna it's way less cute when you do that to me than when I do it to you," he said with a whine before following after her.

* * *

Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed and said kind things, I really appreciate it :) Josh starts reading the baby books in the next chapter and becomes very... Josh about it.


	6. Chapter 6

Working away diligently through a briefing book, Josh was sitting in his office with his feet propped up in a relaxed away on the desk. It was mid-morning and he was prepping for an upcoming meeting. With a pen in his mouth he looked up from his work and sighed. He pulled his feet back from the desk and leaned forward, causing the chair to make a sharp squeaking sound. Pulling his arms over his head he let out a groan as he stretched his limbs upwards. He'd been sitting in the same position for close to 45 minutes.

As he leaned back to stretch, he noticed a book sitting on the corner of his desk. There was a stream of sunlight filtering through the window leading directly to the book. Josh's brow furrowed slightly and he reached forward to grab it. The cover read "What to Expect When You're Expecting".

He opened the book and bent back both sides to try and break in the binding a little bit. He did promise Donna he'd read one of these books.

So far, Josh had felt largely calm throughout Donna's pregnancy, which surprised even him. He was nervous of course, but excited. He felt that with Donna by his side, nothing couldn't be done. It also warmed him to know how excited his mother was by the news. He felt like he was finally giving her something valuable. After years of begging Josh for a grandchild, she'd mostly given up. Josh had always enjoyed kids and being around them, but after a while he just figured he'd missed the train on them. Then he met Donna.

He sniffed and began flipping through the book at random. It didn't take long for him to realize he had the wrong book. The book Donna had told him about was for him as an expectant father. The book he had in his hands was definitely for an expectant mother. Something could still be learned from this book though surely? He continued flipping through, perhaps he could impress Donna with some trivia like knowledge.

He came to a sudden stop when he came to a page with an extremely graphic photo of childbirth and he very nearly dropped the book.

"How," he muttered to himself. He turned the page. This one described the dangers of preeclampsia. Another described the process of a C-section. Josh found another section that described all the things that could go wrong during childbirth and had to actually close the book. He placed it back on the desk and then pushed it to the very edge so he wouldn't have to be close to it.

Had Donna read this stuff yet? Was she panicking? Josh took a deep breath and tried to steady himself. They were just about 5 months in now, so they still had a long way to go. So far they'd experienced no complications, and now that Josh had read through this book, he realized how thankful he was for that.

His heart rate picking up and his breathing quickening, Josh abruptly stood up and grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair. Without another thought, he made his way straight to Donna's office.

"Hi, Mr. Lyman", her assistant Jack said politely as he walked up to the desk impatiently.

"Is she in?" Josh asked, trying not to let his fear show.

"No." Josh sighed and looked down, hands in pockets.

"I'm going to wait in there for her," Josh announced after a few moments of silence. his face was drawn and tight.

Jack would have nodded, but Josh didn't wait for an answer. He whipped open the door to Donna's office and stormed inside. Running an impatient hand through his hair, he quickly made his way to Donna's desk and collapsed in her chair, putting his head in his hands. The enormity of what was happening suddenly all came crashing down on him at once. What if something did go wrong? What if he couldn't protect his kid from whatever challenges they would come to face? He lifted his head and propped it up on a closed fist, staring straight ahead at a single spot on the floor.

Suddenly, he realized that this desk and entire office, smelt like Donna. He took a moment to sit back and focused on that sense of familiarity and felt a wave of calm rush over him. His eyes strayed over the desk and he smiled at the pile of sticky notes, the different colored pens. Then his eyes fell upon the sonogram photo Donna had taped to the bottom of her computer screen. Josh gently pulled it away from the screen and held it up to his nose to examine it. This photo had given him nothing but joy over the past handful of months, but now when he looked at it all he could see were the gruesome graphics and words of Donna's pregnancy book. All he could think about were the things that could go wrong.

He moved over to the sofa situated across the room, sonogram in hand and momentarily felt some bitterness over just how large Donna's office was. Why wasn't his office this big? He sprawled out on the sofa and held the sonogram straight up with both hands above his face. The wavy lines on the black and white picture were all too familiar now, but Josh couldn't help but stare at it, looking for something that was wrong.

The door started to open and Josh heard Donna's voice filter in from her outer office where she was talking with Jack. She signed a piece of paper Jack was holding out for her and then entered her office fully. Josh's eyes immediately fell to the soft curve of her belly. She was properly showing now, maternity pants and all. In spite of himself, Josh found himself smiling again.

"Hey," Donna said happily when she spotted him. "Jack said you would be here."

"Wow an assistant who actually warns you about people in your office? Must be nice," Josh quipped. Donna gave him a smile with a quirk of the head but said nothing. She immediately started rifling through papers on her desk.

Josh moved from the sofa to one of Donna's visiting chairs, watching her work away behind her desk. Donna paused when she noticed Josh not propping his feet up on the desk.

"What's wrong?" she asked softly, looking up from her task. Josh hadn't said word, but his eyebrows shot up at her question.

"What do you mean?"

"Something's wrong," Donna said simply.

"How would you-"

"Josh," Donna said plainly.

"I-" Josh stopped before continuing and changed directions. "Have you felt the baby kick today?"

Donna laughed and began nodding.

"Oh yeah," she chuckled, placing her right hand against her belly gently.

"Yeah?" Josh replied quickly. Donna paused and looked up at him. She heard the over eagerness in his voice.

"What's going on?" she asked again. Josh sat back and tried to shrug nonchalantly. He failed.

"Josh," Donna said seriously. Josh looked up at her for a brief moment, but then let his eyes drop after a few seconds of eye contact.

"It's nothing."

Donna sighed quietly to herself and then moved around the desk to grab Josh's hand and pull him towards the sofa. They both sat and Donna moved Josh's hand to the side of her belly.

Immediately Josh's eyes lit up with wonder as he felt the baby kick against his hand.

"That's like an actual kick this time! I felt that!" he said excitedly. He moved his other hand to join the first and Donna's face lit up at Josh's infectious enthusiasm. She'd started to feel the baby kick a week or so ago, but every time Josh had tried to feel, the kicks were never strong enough.

"That's amazing," Josh muttered quietly.

"What was wrong before?" Donna asked after silence fell between them. Josh's hand never left her stomach. He looked down and shook his head slightly.

"Josh," Donna prompted softly.

"I read one of the uh, baby book things," Josh began. He pulled his hand away.

Donna could see where this was going.

"Donna, there are SO many things that can go wrong," Josh continued, looking up into her eyes. Donna could see the vulnerable fear etched all over Josh's face.

"What if you get preeclampsia or something? What if you-" Josh stood up and started pacing.

"What if something happens that I can't fix or what if the baby is born and it gets hurt or what if the kid needs something and I don't know what to do?" Donna pulled at his hand as he walked past her. He stopped to look at her, his eyes wide.

"I'll be there too you know."

"There are so many things we can't control," Josh said quietly, his voice thick with emotion.

"I know." Donna tugged on his hand and got him to sit down so they were sitting side by side.

"How are we supposed to handle that?" Josh asked her. He turned his head sideways to look at her and rested it against the back of the sofa.

"Together," Donna smiled. Josh gave a small smile back and placed his hand on her belly again, looking down at it.

"You know I was starting to worry," Donna said.

"About what?"

"About you," she was watching his hand as if traced circles around her naval.

Josh sat up a little straighter. "What about me?"

"You have been entirely too calm this entire pregnancy," Donna said. Josh's mouth opened.

"Are you saying me staying calm isn't normal?" he asked her, feeling offended.

Donna shrugged slightly.

"When I talked to CJ last week she asked me if you were freaking out yet and was shocked when I told her no."

Josh frowned.

"You make me sound like a nutcase."

"It's a big change!"

"So was getting married!" Josh argued. "I didn't panic about that!"

"No," Donna said with a smile. "That's true. Maybe you're growing up." Josh pulled his hand away again and crossed his arms with a look that was dangerously close to a pout.

"Maybe not," Donna said, trying not to laugh.

"I just want things to be okay," Josh said after a moment. "I don't want any of my bad luck to extend to the kid."

Donna brushed a thumb over Josh's eyebrow affectionately.

"The baby has a dad who cares about it this much? I think that's a pretty lucky baby." Josh gave her an appreciative look.

"Are we sure we don't wanna find out if its a boy or girl? Calling the baby "it" all the time feels so... dehumanizing."

Donna slouched down on the sofa a little bit and Josh followed suit til they were resting against each other's shoulder.

"We could give it a nickname," Donna suggested. She had both hands resting on her bump.

"I guess," Josh answered.

"Bean?" Donna suggested. Her head shifted slightly as she looked up at Josh's reaction. He was scowling.

"Nah."

"Why not?"

"You really want to think of the baby as something that'll sprout roots and a beanstalk inside of you?"

Donna grimaced. "Fine."

"Peanut?" Josh bobbed his head side to side for a moment before shaking his head again.

"Too generic. We've gotta be more creative than that." Donna rolled her eyes.

"Kicking again," she said, moving Josh's hand to where she could feel the baby. Josh's eyes lit up just as brightly as they had the first time. "Been kicking all day long."

"Let's call it "Roo"." Donna's eyebrows rose in question.

"Like a kangaroo! Cause it won't stop kicking you!" Donna laughed out loud at Josh's sincerity. When she quieted down she looked into Josh's expectant eyes and chuckled out a "fine". Josh looked extremely pleased.

"And you're like the mom kangaroo carrying the baby around in her little, uh, pouch thing," Josh continued, his hand flicking at the wrist as he spoke. Donna laughed.

"You promise you'll tell me if something feels wrong?" Josh asked her, a seriousness taking over his tone.

"Of course," Donna told him honestly.

"I mean like, anything, Donna." Josh continued. "There's nothing too small for you to tell me about. I wanna help."

"You are helping," Donna said kindly. Josh snuggled closer into her side. They sat in silence for a while, both taking comfort in being with each other.

"You wanna help me?" Donna said after a while.

"Yes."

Donna tried to sit up a little straighter.

"Help me off this sofa so I can go pee for the 8th time today," Donna said as sweetly as possible. Without hesitation, Josh stood up and held out both hands for Donna to grab. Donna groaned slightly as she made her way into a standing position.

"God, if this is already a struggle what am I supposed to do when I can't see my feet anymore?" Donna asked Josh seriously as she straightened up.

"You call me," Josh said with a smile. There was a knock at the door and Jack stuck his head in the room.

"Mr. Lyman, Margaret has called three times and has started threatening me. You're last meeting was supposed to start 20 minutes ago."

Donna pinched him. "Go do your job, would you?"

Josh gave her a long-suffering look, but then hooked his arm through hers. "Come on, I'll drop you off at the bathroom on the way. You and Roo."

"My hero," Donna said sarcastically, but she smiled at the use of the baby's nickname.

"I do what I can," Josh smiled back. They slowly made their way to the women's room, which luckily wasn't far from Donna's office. As he made to leave Josh held her gaze steadily.

"Remember what I said okay? Anything you and Roo need. Call me."

"So we're for sure sticking with Roo then?" Donna asked.

"Oh absolutely, no turning back now," Josh said happily. He turned to leave and gave one last look to Donna. "Love you."

"Love you too," she said back. "Roo does too."

She didn't miss the way Josh's eyes softened at her using the nickname.

"Okay," Josh said happily as he began to walk away.

"And Josh?"

He looked back.

"You're doing everything you can. Don't stress yourself out over what could go wrong, okay?"

Josh nodded unconvincingly.

"Josh?" Donna said again for emphasis. Josh nodded.

"Okay."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"Good," Donna smiled. "Now go get to your meeting."

Josh smiled back and returned to the frenzy of another White House day.


End file.
